The weekly newsletter for Fed2 by ibgames

EARTHDATE: April 5, 2009

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TOP TEN THINGS NOT TO DO TO A SLEEPING DEMI-GODDESS

by Jezz

Following a very strange occurrence last week, where Hazed was seen to have fallen asleep and stayed in CDs all night, one staff member, who shall remain nameless, was tempted to do something naughty to Hazed while she slept, but managed to "tap dance" around the issue and avoid several fates worse than death. Our Illustrious Demi-Goddess thought perhaps this week's Top Ten should be something of a Dos and Don'ts, or rather just a Don'ts, list in case that situation should arise again.

So without further ado, here are the Top Ten things NOT to do to a sleeping demi-goddess if you value your next 100 lives and any of your appendages.

10. Don't carry her to the GA roof and out onto the bungee platform, rig her up and wait for her to wake up.
9. Don't put her hand in a cup of warm water.
8. Don't paint little spots all over her face and seclare CDs under quarantine for a computer virus.
7. Don't call nightwatch and have her bundled off to the dorms.
6. Don't dye her hair green.
5. Don't bring the box of fireworks from the roof, set a fuse to ignite the entire box, light it and run like heck.
4. Don't set her up for compromising photos and stick them on the notice board.
3. Don't give her a pirate moustache.
2. Don't spill violently adhesive Omegan Slime Punch and glue her to the barstool.
And debatably the number one thing not to do to Hazed if she falls asleep in CDs is...
1. Don't switch her demi-goddess comm unit for one that sprays red paint when it's used.


Please remember that these suggestions are for your own protection. Thanks, appendage replacement kits, crash helmets and extra insurance policies to Joe, Macdowell, Dingbat, Gungading, Dennotairn and Angelfowl for thinking up the above dastardly deeds.


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