The weekly newsletter for Fed2 by ibgames

EARTHDATE: April 1, 2007

Fed Funnies - page 2


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An Unsolicited Advertisement Produced by Diet Evil Enterprises for Your Knowledge and Entertainment

In anticipation of promotion, Diet Evil Enterprises is pleased to announce The Promotion Sale for Manufacturers & Financiers! Our portfolio is listed below along with the bribe necessary to release a given company's shares to the broker.* The bribe specified is non-negotiable and has been calculated using a variety of economic and other factors.

In exchange for the bribe, Diet Evil Enterprises agrees to release its shares to the broker (and thus the open market) and will not be responsible should a third-party to the transaction buy said shares before you have a chance to purchase them from the broker.

Diet Evil Enterprises will promote -almost instantly- when it holds 3500 shares or less. All previous offers are rescinded.

*Please note that under no circumstances does Diet Evil Enterprises "sell shares back" to a company's own CEO as the CEO never owned the shares in the first place. Diet Evil Enterprises sells shares to the broker. What happens after that sale is of no concern to us.

Portfolio details:

1 slithy for our total holdings in any two companies below
Blue Skies Inc.: 650 shares
Boo Boo Llc: 1000 shares
Galactic Syntax Corp.: 1000 shares
Here's Johnny!, Corp.: 1000 shares
Poetic Justice: 1000 shares
Stormy Barns: 2000 shares

2 slithies for our total holdings in any two companies below
Clock Punching Monkeys Inc: 1000 shares
Desperados Corporation: 500 shares
Elp's: 1000 shares
Highlanders Gadgets: 1000 shares
Knossos Enterprises: 1000 shares
Messenger Inc.: 1000 shares
Rav's Emporium: 1000 shares
Relais & Chateaux: 1000 shares
The Naked Dinger Company: 1000 shares
Weasel Profits, Inc: 2000 shares
Whirlwind Industries: 2000 shares

2 slithies for our total holdings in any one company below
Electric Sheep, Inc.: 1000 shares
Manstone Inc: 1000 shares
Model Makers Management Corp: 1000 shares
Red October Industries, Ltd.: 1000 shares
St. Andrew's Crossword Puzzles: 1000 shares

4 slithies for our total holdings in any one company below
Murderer: 1000 shares

Thank you for your interest in Diet Evil Enterprises. For enquiries, comments, or death threats, please contact Arlene.


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