The weekly newsletter for Fed2 by ibgames

EARTHDATE: June 11, 2006

Official News - page 2

GALLAGHER'S NEW CHARM CAUSES CONSTERNATION AMONGST THE GLITTERATI

Gallagher's put its new monthly charm on sale yesterday and caused an uproar amongst the rich and famous of the Solar System. Generally a byword for expensive and tasteful gifts that become status symbols to those that inhabit the higher reaches of the social stratosphere, the new keyring accessory doesn't fit the usual pattern at all.

It is a tin foil hat, seemingly made of crumpled up silver foil. As usual, it costs a slithy tove to purchase (BUY TIN FOIL HAT) but it clearly only costs a couple of groats to throw together. This is in contrast to previous offerings, which have included an emerald, an apple blossom made from white gold, and several hi-tech items containing hologram images.

We spoke to Mrs Wendy Rich-Grately, a socialite who is usually to be found playing the tables in the Casino on the moon and partaking of the exclusive entertainments in that expensive resort. "Frankly, my dears, I am shocked," she said, "shocked and stunned at the seeming change in policy at Gallagher's. I shall be speaking to dear Anton about it next time we meet for luncheon. After all, one has ones standards to maintain; until now, it was my ambition to own every single one of those adorable charms, but I am not sure I can bring myself to adorn my person with such a tacky item." Pointing to the window display at the Earth store, she continued, "I know many of my best pals feel the same. I can't imagine what Gallagher's hopes to achieve, and I am sure they will come to regret their lack of good taste."

We asked Gallagher's for an official statement about the reasons behind their sale of the new, somewhat downmarket, charm. They refused to comment other than saying that every item on sale in the store was manufactured to the same high quality. We did discover, however, that Anton Gallagher, who usually approves the designs before they are put on sale, is away on vacation right now leaving oversight of the store to an assistant. Perhaps that explains the sudden shocking fall in standards.


Fed2 Star index Previous issues Fed 2 home page