Fed II Star - February 5, 2006

LIARS NEVER WIN
by Vorlar

I exited the Fed Star office much like I usually do, taking a casual stroll northwards towards the landing pad where my space shuttle awaited me. And much like I usually do, I paid little attention to my surroundings as I strolled.

So you can imagine my surprise when my strolling was abruptly halted by the rather large, ominous looking droid which had occupied my path and halted me.

"Ouch!" I shrieked, rubbing my nose which was suddenly hurting quite severely from its impact with the droid's metal chest.

"Vorlar, you must come with me," the droid said.

"Umm... what?" I asked with genuine curiosity.

The droid produced a piece of paper and thrust it rudely in my face.

Vorlar, citizen of Earth, Sol

You are hereby ordered to report to the planet of Marina in the System of Russia to stand trial for your actions against the better interests of our residents.

"Whoa... whoa... what?" I asked.

"Come with me, sir," the droid said, grasping my arm.

"Oh, now I'm 'sir?'" Good to see chivalry isn't dead," I snapped.

With much haste (and not much chivalry) the droid used its firm grip on me to drag me to the landing pad and unceremoniously dump me in the back of a police shuttle.

"This is so degrading," I thought to myself.

"I'll have you know that I am a very well-respected journalist and I plan to report your actions!" I cried.

The video screen in the back of the shuttle lit up and was quickly filled with the live image of a human, adorned in police uniform.

"Thank Bella," I said, "This droid of yours has kidnapped me!"

"Vorlar, you are being brought to Marina to stand trial. There has not been a kidnapping," the man said.

"Stand trial for WHAT?" I demanded, "I haven't DONE anything WRONG!"

"You were warned after your little debacle using the guise of a sick little child to reach the front of line for Hamsters try-outs that Marina wouldn't tolerate that sort of thing," the man said.

"That's what this is about? Just a little white lie?" I asked.

"Maybe to you... 'journalists' it's just a little white lie, but to the kids who really ARE sick Hamsters fans on Marina, it's a very serious matter."

"But I rocked the Hamsters," I quipped.

"Keep cracking jokes, Vorlar. I'm sure the judge will be amused," the man said, and with that the screen went black.

"Don't crack jokes?" I thought. "But... that's what I do!"

I sat back against the wall and cupped my head in my hands. How was I going to talk my way out of this one?

* * * * * *

Apparently, I had fallen asleep. That was the first thing I realized when we arrived at Marina. The second thing I realized was that when you fall asleep in the back of the police shuttle, they wake you up by grabbing you and throwing you to the landing pad.

"Oof!" I grunted as I hit the ground.

"Get up," said the droid.

I stared blankly at the droid, not so much with disobedience but with the disorientation that comes from waking up in a strange place and being, well, thrown.

"Get UP," it repeated, only this time it was accompanied by the droid grabbing my arm and yanking so hard I thought for a second that the arm might go instead of me.

"O-KAY," I said, rising to my feet, a grimace on my face from the pain in my arm. I dusted myself off. "Where to?"

The droid reached for my arm again, but I jerked away.

"I can follow you, you know," I said.

"No tricks," the droid said.

"No tricks," I repeated.

The droid nodded and patted his laser blaster, then began walking. I rolled my eyes and followed it.

I sat in the gloomy courtroom, in the defendant's chair, and awaited the judge.

"All rise!" called the droid, as the judge entered the courtroom.

I rose, and crossed my arms over my chest. When the judge said to sit, I did, obnoxiously. I slammed my butt down on the chair and banged my elbows on the desk.

"If you think throwing a temper tantrum is going to help, Vorlar, you're wrong," the judge said.

"I'm sorry," I said unconvincingly.

"And neither will lying in my courtroom!"

I nodded my head meekly.

"Now then," the judge said, "Do you understand why you have been brought here?"

"Yes... No... Not really, your honor," I said.

"What does that mean?" he asked.

"Well, I've been told of the occurrence which led to this... debacle... but I don't really see what I did wrong."

"I see," the judge said, staring coldly at me.

I felt cowed and insignificant all of a sudden, like everybody understood except for me. What the heck was the big deal?

"Maybe this will help," the judge said.

With that, the doors at the back of the courtroom opened and a parade of youngsters came in, clutching Hamsters memorabilia. They were followed by various medical personnel and paraphernalia.

A lump rose in my throat.

"These kids want to meet the Hamsters, just as much as you do, Vorlar," the judge said, "But they don't pretend to be reporters to do it."

"I..." I stammered, searching for words. "Don't get sappy, Vorlar," I told myself.

A young boy tugged on my arm. I flinched, the pain from the droid yanking my arm revisited in my mind.

The boy gasped and stepped back.

"I'm sorry, it's not you," I said.

The boy just stared at me.

"Well, umm, can I help you?" I asked.

"When you were getting the Hamsters to sign a guitar, was that for me?" the little boy asked.

"Umm..."

A little girl came up behind the boy. "I have EVERY Hamsters CD," she boldly proclaimed, "so it must be for me."

I looked at the judge. He was still staring coldly at me.

"This wasn't supposed to happen," I thought, "I just wanted to rock with the Hamsters."

I needed to figure out a way to make up to these kids the pain that my lie had caused.

"Your honor, with your permission, can I be released for a short time?" I asked, as an idea sprung to my mind.

"We're in the middle of something here, Vorlar. This better be good."

"Permission to approach the bench?" I asked.

"Granted," the judge said.

With that, I hopped up and ran to the judge's bench. I leaned in and whispered my plan to him, hoping it would suffice. The judge nodded.

"Change of heart?" the judge asked with a smirk.

I nodded.

"Well," he continued, "That's a rather bold idea, but if you pull it off we can consider this matter settled. Nurses, please take the children back to the hospital. We're done here, for now."

I thanked the judge and sprinted out of the court room and towards the landing pad.

"Darn," I thought, "I don't have a spaceship here."

Just then, I spotted Djentsch. I ran over to him and grabbed his shoulder.

"Hey!" he shouted, whirring around with the surprise of being grabbed. As he saw me, he barked, "Vorlar! Shouldn't you be in court?"

"Yes. No. Listen. I need your help."

Djentsch arched his eyebrow at me and reached slowly for his I-Beam.

"No, no, seriously," I said. I told him my plan. He nodded.

Djentsch and I headed to the landing pad, and while we walked I relayed the details of my plan to him so he could help me get everything set up.

"You better not scratch this thing," Djentsch said as I climbed aboard his ship.

"Don't worry, I'm an excellent flyer," I said calmly. I pulled the hatch shut, punched the coordinates into the control panel, and off I went.

Being a journalist has its perks. One of those perks is that we have the comm unit info for anybody who is anybody in the Fed Star office, just in case we REALLY need to get in touch with them. Well, I REALLY need some help. I looked up Otis from the Hamsters.

"Otis, I really need your help," I said in a tight beam message.

"Who are you?" he replied.

"Vorlar, but that's not important right now."

"Umm... do I know you?" he asked.

"Yes... no..." I said. Boy, I was having a hard time communicating with people today.

"Okay, goodbye," he said.

"Otis, WAIT, please. It's for some sick kids." I said.

"You have my attention, then, what's going on?" he asked.

I recanted the whole story to him, how I got to the audition, why I never went back, what happened with Djentsch and Marina and the kids.

"You're a real jerk," he said.

"I know. I'm trying to make it right, will you help me?" I asked.

"After the way you played last week, I think I can help," Otis said.

"Excellent," I thought.

* * * * * *

"Kids, kids!" the head nurse called out, "Come sit down by the stage, someone special is here to see you."

The kids came in one by one, sitting in front of the stage set up in the waiting room of the hospital. Nobody was on stage, just two guitars and microphones.

The head nurse climbed on stage and spoke into one of the microphones.

"Kids, remember nice Mr. Vorlar we met the other day?" she asked.

The kids nodded slowly.

"Well, he has a surprise for you," the head nurse said.

She waved to me from the door and I came in and climbed on stage. I slung my guitar over my shoulder and spoke into the other mike.

"First, I want to apologize that it's taken me so long to give you what you really deserve," I said, "But there is an autographed Hamsters picture waiting for each of you back in your rooms."

The kids' eyes lit up, so brightly that I almost forgot that I had just spent four hours and four months salary going from music store to music store to find that many autographed Hamsters pictures.

"Oh, and there's one other thing," I said.

I motioned to the door. "Could you come out here?" I called.

Shrieks erupted from the kids as Otis came into the waiting room. He was immediately enveloped in a giant bear hug, administered by every child in the room at once.

I smiled, appreciating the genuine look of joy on the faces of all the kids – and Otis. "I could take a lesson from him," I thought.

"Alright kids, you want to hear some Hamsters songs?" he asked.

"YEAH!" came the resounding cry.

With that, Otis hopped up on the stage and grabbed his guitar. He nodded to me and we went into our set, playing all the Hamsters hits and taking requests from the kids in the crowd.

When it was over, the nurses hurried the kids back to their rooms for some much needed rest. I sat on the edge of the stage, drinking a bottle of water.

The head nurse popped her head back in.

"Thanks, you two," she said, "Some of these kids don't have much time left – and I've never seen them smile so brightly."

With that, she popped back out to take care of the children.

"See, V, It isn't about the money or the fame," Otis said.

"What?" I asked, snapped out of my daydreams.

"Music," he said, "It's not about who you are or what you make. It's about days like today. I've never felt so good."

"Wow," I thought, "I'm not the only one."

"I appreciate your help," I said, "Now there's a couple people I have to go thank."

"Who?" Otis asked.

"Djentsch and the judge," I said, "Two of the most important guys I've ever met. Without them we wouldn't have been here today. They really changed my entire outlook on life."

Otis smiled as I headed out, ready to rearrange my priorities and not overlook people like these children again.